A bunch of funny George Lopez jokes. If you’re a fan of the comedian George Lopez you will enjoy this list of his jokes.
Jokes from George Lopez
Max: What’s a period?
George: It’s a bullet we dodge, go get ready.
Y’know, if those pews reclined, and the priests gave the Raiders scores I’d go to church every Sunday.
Angie Lopez: This is a big job, shouldn’t you hire professional? George Lopez: Professionals?! Angie please! I got this!
Barack Obama may be black, but John McCain is the first Albino presidential candidate: he’s completely see-through!
As long as you’re a tax deduction, you’ll always be safe in my house.
If I don’t know it, you don’t either. When did the Korean War start? I don’t know, so neither do you!
You know how Mexican restaurants always have “border” in the name: Border Grill, Border Cafe. You wouldn’t do that to black people: Kunta’s Kitchen or Shackles. They don’t do it to white people. You don’t see the Honkey Grill, the Cracker Barrel…. oh, nevermind.
Funny George Lopez Jokes
George: Why’ve you had a grudge against your brother for 15 years?
Benny: We Lopezes are a proud people…
George: You have a birthday lunch at Denny’s every month. We’re not that proud!
Sarah Palin has to be Latina: she has a job and her husband don’t work. She’s gonna be a grandma, and has an infant-she’s Latina.
Just yesterday you were my little girl on a tricycle. Now you’re a young woman in a car, running over a little girl on a tricycle.
(Growing Up) Everything was no. Birthday party? “No get Birthday party. Mira cabron. You got a lot of things already. You don’t need a party. So’s you can showoff? No. Why you crying now? No. Chucky Cheese? You wanna see a mouse, pull the refrigerator out.”
I promise to start listening to your feelings if you promise not to have so many of them.
George Lopez is a popular comedian and actor.